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Posted by OSH on 07-07-2008 11:40 PM:

I'm going to be.

A dad. What am I in for!??! Ay ay ay!

__________________

I'm gay. <3 <3 <3

Posted by ZootedLooter on 07-08-2008 12:10 AM:

start taking drugs

__________________
zooted adj : 1. under influence of drugs: relaxed, excited, or euphoric from taking illegal drugs, especially marijuana ( slang ) 2. intoxicated: very intoxicated ( informal )
looter n. : someone who takes spoils or plunder (as in war) [syn: plunderer, pillager, spoiler, despoiler, raider, freebooter]

Posted by Avenue_1 on 07-08-2008 12:15 AM:

Congrats kid! Good on ya

__________________
I'M NEVER COMING BACK TO THESE FORUMS... BOOHOOHOO

OH WAIT...I'M BACK

Posted by Vampire on 07-08-2008 12:19 AM:

Not quite sure what to say.

If it wasn't planned, you're in for a shock.

If it was planned, you're still in for a shock (especially knowing how young you are).

Either way, once that kid hits your life you won't know what hits you. You'll go through every damn emotion under the sun (except lust... that one's reserved for Neversoft ). At times you'll regret it and other times you'll wonder why you didn't do it sooner.

ps.... your social life is now officially fucked. Welcome to the club.

:EDIT: ....most of all though, congratulations.

Posted by OSH on 07-08-2008 12:55 AM:

Thank you guys. I'm pretty excited, as well as nervous as one would expect. I just hope that the baby comes out healthy, that worries me the most.

__________________

I'm gay. <3 <3 <3

Posted by Vampire on 07-08-2008 01:10 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by Objectivist Seal Hunter
I just hope that the baby comes out healthy, that worries me the most.

...and, personally speaking, that didn't end for me until I saw that fat little bastard squeeze out the end of my missus in one perfect little piece. I was shitting a brick constantly until that single moment.... upon which I uttered the words "he's perfect".. unlike the smashed-up, bloody pulp that used to be my missus' vagina!

I think I even asked the doctor to put a few extra stitches in to "get it back to normal".

Posted by LOLobo on 07-08-2008 05:35 AM:

have her abort

seriously

Posted by OSH on 07-08-2008 08:17 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by Vampire
...and, personally speaking, that didn't end for me until I saw that fat little bastard squeeze out the end of my missus in one perfect little piece. I was shitting a brick constantly until that single moment.... upon which I uttered the words "he's perfect".. unlike the smashed-up, bloody pulp that used to be my missus' vagina!

I think I even asked the doctor to put a few extra stitches in to "get it back to normal".

Lmfao. Cesarean section please!

__________________

I'm gay. <3 <3 <3

Posted by Neversoft on 07-08-2008 10:46 AM:

Re: I'm going to be.

quote:
Originally posted by Objectivist Seal Hunter
A dad. What am I in for!??! Ay ay ay!

I'm calling the U.N. Surely this qualifies as a "Crime Against Humanity"

Posted by Linnets on 07-08-2008 12:52 PM:

Re: I'm going to be.

quote:
Originally posted by Objectivist Seal Hunter
What am I in for!??!

Years of joy.

Seriously.

Yeah OK I'm not saying it's easy but until you have kids you have no idea what unconditional love means. I had my first kid when I was 19. I shit myself when I found out. I've got 4 now (only 1 was planned

). However I wouldn't change it one bit.

As the Vamp says your social life can get a bit fucked, I never really had one in my youth, but if you enjoy seeing your kids happy then you don't really mind. Well not for the first few years anyway.

Congratulations and good luck to ya fella.

Posted by OSH on 07-09-2008 06:51 AM:

^^^ Thank you. The girl has an appointment to see the doctor tomorrow, so hopefully all is well. I'm afraid that the baby might suffer birth defects (not caused by me!). For a couple reasons, but mainly because recently my girlfriend broke her pelvis and had an x-ray. She wasn't positive that she was pregnant at the time so when asked if she was she replied with a, "No.". They told her that the x-ray could do damage (i.e. cause birth defects). So I'm super nervous along with the girlfriend.

__________________

I'm gay. <3 <3 <3

Posted by David Cameron on 07-09-2008 07:14 AM:

It would be highly unlikely that the radiation from a single Xray would cause any birth defects. Besides, who WOULDN'T want a 2 headed baby? Plus, some kind of mutation needs to occur to prevent the kid inherenting its fathers ugly so if I were you i'd be beating the shit out of my mrs in the hope of procuring more free xrays.

Posted by OSH on 07-09-2008 07:27 AM:

Lol.

__________________

I'm gay. <3 <3 <3

Posted by The CandyMan on 07-20-2008 07:16 PM:

Dirty diapers. You get use to the smell and each much easier when it's your own kid but you'll never forget that odor.

__________________

Posted by Neversoft on 07-20-2008 08:47 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by Objectivist Seal Hunter
my girlfriend broke her pelvis and had an x-ray. She wasn't positive that she was pregnant at the time

A real man would break her pelvis GETTING her pregnant

WOOHAH!!

Posted by antihero on 07-20-2008 09:28 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by Vampire

Either way, once that kid hits your life you won't know what hits you. You'll go through every damn emotion under the sun (except lust... that one's reserved for Neversoft ). At times you'll regret it and other times you'll wonder why you didn't do it sooner.

ps.... your social life is now officially fucked. Welcome to the club.

Amen to that. Mine is now nearly 6 months already! Sometimes you love them more than anything, sometimes you want to throw them under a bus.....but I wouldn't change a thing.

congrats fella

__________________
How does Stephen Hawking run?

On double A's

Posted by OSH on 07-21-2008 08:13 AM:

Thank you, thank you. I bet it will be great, I'm really excited!!!

__________________

I'm gay. <3 <3 <3

Posted by Darlowad on 07-21-2008 09:50 AM:

my lil girls 6th b'day today !!

time fly's m8 make the most of it

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A Vote for Ave is a Vote for FREEDOM!

Posted by fatfecker on 07-21-2008 04:41 PM:

how weird, my daughter's 6th birthday tomorrow, other peoples kids are rubbish but your own kids are great

Posted by Vampire on 07-21-2008 04:44 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by fatfecker
other peoples kids are rubbish but your own kids are great

Yeah... that's very true. Oh, it's my kid's 7th birthday on Wednesday.

:EDIT: ...fuck, fuck, fuck. No it's not... it's the missus' birthday then, the kid's is on the 7th August. I need to go and sort presents and a card out quickly.

Posted by LOLobo on 07-25-2008 03:35 AM:

fuck fuck fuck is right.

I just told my 8 yr old that he was a mistake. Don't do that.

12 yr anniversary today, b-days: aug 3rd - wife, aug 7th - mom, aug 13th - son

I'm fucked.

Posted by bartleby on 07-25-2008 12:21 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by LOLobo
fuck fuck fuck is right.

I just told my 8 yr old that he was a mistake. Don't do that.
.

Why the fuck would you do that ?

__________________
snoochie boochies

Posted by ZootedLooter on 07-26-2008 03:48 AM:

cause hes dysfunxional...and his kid is mostly mexican

hes just making sure that he finishes the job

edit....and finalyy good luck lost ina haze

Posted by OSH on 07-26-2008 08:08 AM:

__________________

I'm gay. <3 <3 <3

Posted by OSH on 09-12-2008 10:36 AM:

So the girl and I find out the sex of the baby on the 25th. I just want to know already!!

__________________

I'm gay. <3 <3 <3

Posted by ZootedLooter on 09-12-2008 09:18 PM:

im pretty sure someone nameless here can stick his head up there...give it a peek and let you know sooner

Posted by precocious on 09-14-2008 10:45 PM:

I'm sorry I thought you were gay?

Posted by Avenue_1 on 09-14-2008 11:28 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by precocious
I'm sorry I thought you were gay?

Stop the flames son, or you'll lose your account.

Posted by HoldDaSalad on 09-15-2008 05:59 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by Gimp Mask
Stop the flames son, or you'll lose your account.

Actually how can it be a flame when it's true? Haaa

Congrats OSH, Are you sure it's yours?

I'm just glad I didn't have any children, I'd be a single father now.

Posted by OSH on 09-15-2008 09:20 AM:

^^^ Yes Para, I'm positive. The girl and I are attached at the hip.

__________________

I'm gay. <3 <3 <3

Posted by Vampire on 09-15-2008 11:05 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by Objectivist Seal Hunter
The girl and I are attached at the hip.

You fucked your own siamese twin?

*gives OSH a high five*

Posted by precocious on 09-16-2008 10:04 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by Gimp Mask
Stop the flames son, or you'll lose your account.

I'm female and I was being serious.

Posted by yoshy on 09-16-2008 11:45 AM:

Girl power..............gotta love a girl with spunk

__________________
When life hands you lemons, ask for tequila and salt and call me over.

There comes a point in your life when you realise;
who matters,
who never did,
who won't any more...
and who always will.
So, don't worry about people from your past,
there's a reason why they didn't make it to your future.

Posted by Neversoft on 09-16-2008 12:35 PM:

... and it does say "I'm gay. <3 <3 <3" in his sig

Posted by yoshy on 09-16-2008 01:15 PM:

wrong again gimp..................its a habit that can be kicked..............

just don't try so hard

try being nice and..err....normal

nice modding gimp..............HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

thank PHO you're not

*PHO=GOD

Posted by Avenue_1 on 09-16-2008 01:24 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by precocious
I'm female and I was being serious.

Picture proof.

Posted by Avenue_1 on 09-16-2008 01:27 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by yoshy
wrong again gimp..................its a habit that can be kicked..............

just don't try so hard

try being nice and..err....normal

nice modding gimp..............HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

thank PHO you're not

*PHO=GOD

What in the name of fuck are you talking about boy?

What are you for?

and What's your malfunction son?

Posted by LOLobo on 09-16-2008 05:22 PM:

TITSORGTFO

Posted by precocious on 09-16-2008 05:33 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by Gimp Mask
Picture proof.

lol no

Posted by HoldDaSalad on 09-16-2008 06:08 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by precocious
lol no

I believe ya for the fact you barely post. There are more than just Cookie on this forum who are female, Most just don't post.

Gimp Mask: is really a female
Neversoft: It just depends on the day
ManCandy: wishes he was a female so he could finger himself.
OSH: He's just gay
Yoshy: is just a bitch
ZootedLooter: He fucked a female once and she got pregnant and now she has his bastard child.
Lolobo: He think's he's a male, The strap-on isn't a real penis, So the kid isn't yours.
Stupidcunt: He fucks guys and claims he's straight. He's our forum bitch.
Parasiticgannon: He's just a fat bastard

Posted by The CandyMan on 09-16-2008 06:12 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by parasiticgannon
Parasiticgannon: He's just a fat bitch

Fixed!

__________________

Posted by Neversoft on 09-16-2008 07:14 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by parasiticgannon
Neversoft: It just depends on the day

Fuckin noob the jokes on you... I'm androgynous!

Posted by HoldDaSalad on 09-16-2008 07:23 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by The CandyMan
Fixed!

Is that the best you can come up with? Seriously? Be fuckin original for once. You love to take others jokes and run with em. Well your jokes are about as original as your music taste, LOL.

Posted by MrEMann on 09-16-2008 08:23 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by LOLobo
fuck fuck fuck is right.

I just told my 8 yr old that he was a mistake. Don't do that.

12 yr anniversary today, b-days: aug 3rd - wife, aug 7th - mom, aug 13th - son

I'm fucked.

Ass. You should know better.

Congrats OSH. You'll love it, after the brat is old enough to take care of their self.

__________________

Posted by LOLobo on 09-16-2008 09:42 PM:

He just turned 9, told his ass to get over it :P

Posted by Avenue_1 on 09-16-2008 10:20 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by LOLobo
He just turned 9, told his ass to get over it :P

That's what Gary Glitter said to the boys

Posted by ZootedLooter on 09-16-2008 11:53 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by parasiticgannon
ZootedLooter: He fucked a female once and she got pregnant and now she has his bastard child.

unfuckin beleivable...how did i get dragged into this?!?!?!?!

before you start runnin off with your caramel and chocolate covered mouth...get your facts straight.....

....i fucked her 2x and and have 2 bastard kids\

Posted by Neversoft on 09-17-2008 12:42 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by ZootedLooter
runnin off with your caramel and chocolate covered mouth

I find that image strangely erotic... I'll be having an extra wank tonight.

Posted by OSH on 09-17-2008 03:29 AM:

This thread went from being about me having a kid to a battle of the bitches. I love it.

__________________

I'm gay. <3 <3 <3

Posted by LOLobo on 09-17-2008 04:29 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by ZootedLooter

....i fucked her 2x and and have 2 bastard kids\

lol, chocolate face

I thought she had a 3rd bun in the oven?

Posted by David Cameron on 09-17-2008 07:11 AM:

The third ones mine.

How many buns have you put in ovens Para?

Posted by LOLobo on 09-17-2008 07:59 AM:

For the sake of the universe, I hope he's sterile.

Posted by HoldDaSalad on 09-17-2008 08:03 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by cupidstunt
The third ones mine.

How many buns have you put in ovens Para?

Um, I can't disclose that information here.

Posted by precocious on 09-17-2008 10:54 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by Objectivist Seal Hunter
This thread went from being about me having a kid to a battle of the bitches. I love it.

I'm sorry if I misunderstood about your erm ungayness. It was your sig that led me to believe otherwise.

Congratulations. A word to the wise on having a child. I advise not to be present at the birth. For many men it changes the way they see the woman afterwards. Instead of sexual partner they see her as mother and that part of the anatomy where previously a penis went in, is now a part where a baby came out.

Also, she may not want to have sex as often for a time post partum, so stock up on the porn.

Posted by Avenue_1 on 09-17-2008 05:19 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by precocious

Congratulations. A word to the wise on having a child. I advise not to be present at the birth. For many men it changes the way they see the woman afterwards. Instead of sexual partner they see her as mother and that part of the anatomy where previously a penis went in, is now a part where a baby came out.

That is why God invented the caesarian

You seem to be speaking from experience, did your fella see your twat all mangled and go off sex then you lost your sex drive?

Posted by precocious on 09-17-2008 08:36 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by Gimp Mask
That is why God invented the caesarian

You seem to be speaking from experience, did your fella see your twat all mangled and go off sex then you lost your sex drive?

I was speaking generally, neveryou mind about my 'twat' lol.

Posted by Avenue_1 on 09-17-2008 08:44 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by precocious
I was speaking generally, neveryou mind about my 'twat' lol.

Stop flirting with me, i'm old enough to be your uncle...

Posted by ZootedLooter on 09-17-2008 11:20 PM:

a chick with enough balls for this place...welcome precocious...ignore all the tit pic comments you will be getting

and lobo...the girl gave me a scare on my birthday but by the time i got home she had taken another test that read negative

Posted by David Cameron on 09-18-2008 05:17 PM:

You feeling broody precocious? Want to borrow some fertilizer?

Oh

And

Show us your tits.

Posted by Avenue_1 on 09-18-2008 05:20 PM:

Tits are boring, we want a pic of precocious bent over with legs spread wide so we can see her in all her glory

Posted by Neversoft on 09-18-2008 07:05 PM:

Shit guys, you really have *no* class do you? The only way a pic of a 'twat' is on topic in this thread is of OSH posts action shots from the delivery room.

Don't worry about these animals (Disgusting, vile misogynists aren't they?) Precocious, I'll save you...

*unscrews the rohypnol*

Fancy a drink?

Posted by HoldDaSalad on 09-18-2008 07:44 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by Gimp Mask
Tits are boring, we want a pic of precocious bent over with legs spread wide so we can see her in all her glory

I think this just proves your a virgin. Do you even know what twat looks like? Well you could just look in the mirror and smile, Cause your the biggest twat in existence.

Posted by Avenue_1 on 09-18-2008 08:05 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by parasiticgannon
I think this just proves your a virgin. Do you even know what twat looks like? Well you could just look in the mirror and smile, Cause your the biggest twat in existence.

LOL Haven't heard that "it proves you're a virgin" thing since i was like 13

Thank you for having downs syndrome and giving me a laugh

Now, you special boy you, coochey coochey coo... you can go back to reading harry potter books and let the adults talk

Posted by fatfecker on 09-18-2008 08:37 PM:

nothing wrong with Harry Potter books

Posted by David Cameron on 09-18-2008 08:50 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by fatfecker
nothing wrong with Harry Potter books

Agreed, nothing wrong with Harry Potter books... for 7 year olds.

Posted by HoldDaSalad on 09-19-2008 06:27 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by Gimp Mask
LOL Haven't heard that "it proves you're a virgin" thing since i was like 13
Thank you for having downs syndrome and giving me a laugh

Now, you special boy you, coochey coochey coo... you can go back to reading harry potter books and let the adults talk

I'm shocked you got that, Jeez you must be as old as me.

StupidCunt at least he reads.

Posted by Neversoft on 09-19-2008 07:28 AM:

Meanwhile, back in the womb of OSH's missus...

Posted by HoldDaSalad on 09-19-2008 07:47 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by Neversoft
Meanwhile, back in the womb of OSH's missus...

I was just there a little while ago, it was boring.

Posted by OSH on 09-20-2008 05:57 AM:

Thursday needs to come already, I'm ripping out my hair here!

__________________

I'm gay. <3 <3 <3

Posted by OSH on 09-25-2008 11:40 PM:

__________________

I'm gay. <3 <3 <3

Posted by Darlowad on 09-26-2008 12:44 AM:

Thumbs up from the baby seal (bottom pic)
cool btw

__________________
A Vote for Ave is a Vote for FREEDOM!

Posted by Linnets on 09-26-2008 11:06 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by Darlowad v6.0b
...baby seal...(bottom pic)
cool btw

Surely thats a seal pup.

Are those 3d scans the norm in the states? We just get ultrasound ones as standard here. I think the 3d ones cost 40 or 50 quid!

BTW shouldn't the pics be in the "little bastard photo" thread?

Posted by OSH on 09-26-2008 11:15 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by Linnets
Surely thats a seal pup.

Are those 3d scans the norm in the states? We just get ultrasound ones as standard here. I think the 3d ones cost 40 or 50 quid!

BTW shouldn't the pics be in the "little bastard photo" thread?

You know, I didn't think they 3d/4d scans were the norm (and they may not be), I wasn't expecting on e at all. They first did a standard ultrasound to see if the organs and whatnot were ok, and followed with the 3d/4d. Idk how good the girls insurance is or whatever, but hopefully it covers the charge!

And about the picture: I thought it was appropriate to place it here because the thread talks about the girl and I getting an ultrasound...and I wanted to display the results! Once the boy arrives his picture will be placed in the "little bastard photo" thread.

__________________

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