VCDQuality Forums (http://www.vcdhq.com/forum/index.php)
- The Pink Prison (http://www.vcdhq.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?forumid=55)
-- While taking a shit (competition) (http://www.vcdhq.com/forum/showthread.php?threadid=80578)

While taking a shit

Neversoft's Input:

Here's a forum "competition" for you cunts...

Next time you have a shit, take a picture and post it in this thread. In two weeks time we'll have a vote on who's shit is the most impressive. There's only one rule - It must be your turd!

I doubt there will be any prizes involved but maybe we could afford to get you some Immodium or Ex-Lax, depending on the state of your dumps. There are no winning criteria, we just want the most visually striking; be it size, quantity, texture, colour or outright nastiness... WE NEED YOUR SHITS!


Ave's input:

In the picture hold a piece of paper saying your vcdq alias.


Just thought I'd put it on the front page, for all you lazy fuck who dont want to travel to ole softys post.

:]

i dont think that thinking or not thinking should be the topic here.....im takin odds at 3 to 1 that you had the laptop on the shitter

__________________
zooted adj : 1. under influence of drugs: relaxed, excited, or euphoric from taking illegal drugs, especially marijuana ( slang ) 2. intoxicated: very intoxicated ( informal )
looter n. : someone who takes spoils or plunder (as in war) [syn: plunderer, pillager, spoiler, despoiler, raider, freebooter]

quote:

---

Originally posted by ZootedLooter
im takin odds at 3 to 1 that you had the laptop on the shitter

---

Just keep the laptop away from the baseball cards when i rob you.

__________________

Hold Da Motha Fuckin Salad.

yeah vampire9s.....that 88er is a little off

__________________
zooted adj : 1. under influence of drugs: relaxed, excited, or euphoric from taking illegal drugs, especially marijuana ( slang ) 2. intoxicated: very intoxicated ( informal )
looter n. : someone who takes spoils or plunder (as in war) [syn: plunderer, pillager, spoiler, despoiler, raider, freebooter]

quote:

---

Originally posted by ZootedLooter
i dont think that thinking or not thinking should be the topic here.....im takin odds at 3 to 1 that you had the laptop on the shitter

---

I use laptop and phone on shitter. Sometimes I think about stuff, other times I inspect the resulting mess, depends on the day.

FFS Wipe and move on!!

quote:

---

Originally posted by XXXBoX
FFS Wipe and move on!!

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by XXXBoX
FFS Wipe and move on!!

---

I'm far too busy screaming in agony and scooping my prolapsed anus back in to stop and contemplate stuff.

__________________
Statistically... 9 out of 10 people actually enjoy gang rape.

quote:

---

Originally posted by socks
You must be single. Shitting is a guys pure alone time because even women wont bother you on the shitter.

---

__________________

I'm divorced

Fuck that - Shit time is my time, sure conversations are attempted but promptly ignored.

quote:

---

Originally posted by socks
I'm divorced

Fuck that - Shit time is my time, sure conversations are attempted but promptly ignored.

---

I think about how I feel for my poor rectum as it tears little by little each time I fertilize the bowl. That thing has taken a beating (DUE TO MASSIVE SHITS FAGGOTS!).

__________________


I'm gay. <3 <3 <3

quote:

---

Originally posted by LostInAHazeOfMyself
I think about how I feel for my poor rectum as it tears little by little each time I fertilize the bowl. That thing has taken a beating (DUE TO MASSIVE SHITS & FAGGOTS!).

---

__________________
snoochie boochies

hahahahahaha.

Lmfao. Oh man.

__________________


I'm gay. <3 <3 <3

The shitter is my private time. I'll sit there for 10min straight until my ass is too sore.

Sometimes I'll bring my blackberry to play poker on the can, no one can bug me in there.

__________________
Spitball Admin
http://www.spitballcinema.com

quote:

---

Originally posted by Lord_Gandalf
I'll sit there for 10min straight until my ass is too sore.

---

try sitting there for 2 years

__________________
zooted adj : 1. under influence of drugs: relaxed, excited, or euphoric from taking illegal drugs, especially marijuana ( slang ) 2. intoxicated: very intoxicated ( informal )
looter n. : someone who takes spoils or plunder (as in war) [syn: plunderer, pillager, spoiler, despoiler, raider, freebooter]

quote:

---

Originally posted by Bit_Confused
thats gonna turn out well.

---

Here's a forum "competition" for you cunts...

Next time you have a shit, take a picture and post it in this thread. In two weeks time we'll have a vote on who's shit is the most impressive. There's only one rule - It must be your turd!

I doubt there will be any prizes involved but maybe we could afford to get you some Immodium or Ex-Lax, depending on the state of your dumps. There are no winning criteria, we just want the most visually striking; be it size, quantity, texture, colour or outright nastiness... WE NEED YOUR SHITS!

__________________
Statistically... 9 out of 10 people actually enjoy gang rape.

quote:

---

Originally posted by Neversoft
Here's a forum "competition" for you cunts...

Next time you have a shit, take a picture and post it in this thread. In two weeks time we'll have a vote on who's shit is the most impressive. There's only one rule - It must be your turd!

I doubt there will be any prizes involved but maybe we could afford to get you some Immodium or Ex-Lax, depending on the state of your dumps. There are no winning criteria, we just want the most visually striking; be it size, quantity, texture, colour or outright nastiness... WE NEED YOUR SHITS!

---

__________________
Spitball Admin
http://www.spitballcinema.com

You know the bit where i said IT HAS TO BE YOUR SHIT... Go eat some fibre and try again

__________________
Statistically... 9 out of 10 people actually enjoy gang rape.

how are we suppose to verify that... carve our name in the log?

__________________
Spitball Admin
http://www.spitballcinema.com

Hold a bit of paper with vcdq written on it in front of cam while taking pic.

__________________
..:::RESERVED:::..

quote:

---

Originally posted by Avenue_1 v5.0b
Hold a bit of paper with vcdq written on it in front of cam while taking pic.

---

__________________
Spitball Admin
http://www.spitballcinema.com

To be honest, if I'm suspicious I'll just Google for "pictures of shit" and if your picture appears in the results, I'll delete it. I'm sure the other forum members will quickly "out" cheats anyway

Besides, surely it's more fun to photograph your own fetid detritus than to search through pictures of others... Isn't it?

__________________
Statistically... 9 out of 10 people actually enjoy gang rape.

Here's mine.................................................

Here's one I turned out when I got back from work just now. It's not a biggie but I did get some nice slug-trails down the back of the bowl and I finished off by pissing on it... The most exciting part has to be taking the pic and keeping your butt-cheeks apart, although this particular dump was quite a "clean" greasy one:

__________________
Statistically... 9 out of 10 people actually enjoy gang rape.

This is going to be stomach churning. Should we post our vomit too? Maybe the puss that comes out of some of our STD covered shafts?

__________________


I'm gay. <3 <3 <3

quote:

---

Originally posted by LostInAHazeOfMyself
This is going to be stomach churning. Should be post our vomit too? Maybe the puss that comes out of some of our STD covered shafts?

---

Agreed. ^^^

__________________


I'm gay. <3 <3 <3

I'm going to eat a dozen pickled onions soaked in chilli, a couple of hot pepperamis, a nice spicy Pizza Express "Sloppy Guiseppe" pizza and drink four cans of Scrumpy Jack tomorrow morning in preparation for this. I'm going to lay down some bog paper for the foundation (so the crap doesn't disappear down the u-bend), open my guts and then spaff over the crap to make a nice shitcum sundae.

I am pissed though so may change my mind tomorrow morning.

mother fucker...
I wish I read this 2 minutes ago.

now this is vcdq at its best....welcome back boys.....that x69 overhaul is working already

__________________
zooted adj : 1. under influence of drugs: relaxed, excited, or euphoric from taking illegal drugs, especially marijuana ( slang ) 2. intoxicated: very intoxicated ( informal )
looter n. : someone who takes spoils or plunder (as in war) [syn: plunderer, pillager, spoiler, despoiler, raider, freebooter]

This SHIT cracks me up every time.
Coz its true

__________________
*Meet the rest of the VCDQ Crew, HERE *

quote:

---

Originally posted by ZootedLooter
now this is vcdq at its best....welcome back boys.....that x69 overhaul is working already

---

__________________
Statistically... 9 out of 10 people actually enjoy gang rape.

I clearly have a phobia about shitting "in public" seeing as I've not had a dump since the competition was announced. I've had the pickled onions, I've had the peperami, I've had the Scrumpy (and Stella and red wine) but substituted the pizza for a lasagne (topped with Tabasco sauce though) and still nothing.

quote:

---

Originally posted by Vampire
I clearly have a phobia about shitting "in public" seeing as I've not had a dump since the competition was announced. I've had the pickled onions, I've had the peperami, I've had the Scrumpy (and Stella and red wine) but substituted the pizza for a lasagne (topped with Tabasco sauce though) and still nothing.

---

Haha You stole this from Hustler mag...they used to have this competition every month..........Im not sure if they still do or not

Yes stolen.

Because we all read Hustler and it's impossible anyone else could have the same shitty idea.

We all steal something...
Yea I even have a online supscription that I stole to playboy with zino..
Just got the edition with Maria in it this month..That hot diva bitch from WWE.....
I personaly admire the female anatomy
im a lesbian trapped inside a mans body I dont ever think il ever go straight

quote:

---

Originally posted by LOLobo
shitty idea.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by LOLobo

shitty idea.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by xParaDox
You know something
I cant shit in public either... :/ dunno why
I just hold it until I get home.

---

I love going for a shit at work but the fuckers who just come in after you've started jump in to the cubicle next to me and let rip just fucking piss me off. I was fucking there first and i dont want to fucking play "battleshits" - fucking cunts!

I now frequent the 4th floor in the building which has a high girl count and thus the gents is pretty quiet!

quote:

---

Originally posted by XXXBoX
I used to be the same! But then I discovered a whole new world having a shit at work! I get a whole 15 minutes to read the paper, text people, play games on my phone all at the expense of my company and no fucker moans!!!!

Order of the day: Try new things, take a shit somewhere new

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by xParaDox
Aside from that reason Public urinals tend to be quite unsanitary. :/

---

i thought possibly this was a competition to see who would shit in a public place (IE a museum hall). fuck youre all boring.

quote:

---

Originally posted by Bakkoda
i thought possibly this was a competition to see who would shit in a public place (IE a museum hall). fuck youre all boring.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by socks
You talk the talk, can you.... walk the walk?

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by stickywicket
Helpful hint, don't shit in the urinal. Shit in the toilet instead.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Bakkoda
last time i got kicked out of a local pizza place for being publically intoxicated, we took the liberty of upperdecking one of the johns. ive personally never drop trou in the li8kes of a convenience store or such. Prolly wouldnt look good for the group of kids I coach. Lot of angry parents.

---

As someone who travels around town for work, I spend quite a bit of time in public restrooms so I have no problem shitting in a public restroom provided a.) there's a coupious amount of toilet paper available that has not been shit/pissed/wiped on and b.) the toilet looks half-way clean though I lay approximately 2 to 3 layers of paper on the seat which is why the coupious amount of butt tissue is required.

I actually thought of writting a book about my experiences in public restrooms in my town appropriately titled "Shitting Across Columbus: A guide to Columbus Public Restrooms". Some of the things I have seen would make most of you wake up in the night screaming.

__________________

quote:

---

[i]The UK sucks [/B]

---

__________________

Hold Da Motha Fuckin Salad.

__________________
Spitball Admin
http://www.spitballcinema.com

BROWN POWER!!!11

__________________
[16:37] <@Virus^> its a dead cert im telling you
[16:37] <@Virus^> you will be gutted if you miss out

Using this as the basis for our....


AWARD SHITSTEM:

1. GHOST SHIT. You know you've shitted.
There's shit on the toilet paper, but none
in the toilet.

2. TEFLON-COATED SHIT. Comes out so slick, clean and easy that you
don't even feel it. No trace of shit on the
paper. You have to look in the toilet to make
sure you did something.

3. GOOEY-SHIT. This has the consistency of hot tar. You wipe
your arse 12 times and it's still not clean.
You end up putting toilet paper in your jocks
so that you don't stain them. This kind of shit
leaves permanent skid marks in the toilet.

4. SECOND THOUGHT SHIT. You're all done wiping, and you're about to
stand up when you realise....you've got more.

5. POP A VEIN IN YOUR The kind of shit that killed Elvis. It doesn't
FOREHEAD SHIT. come out till you're all sweaty, trembling and
purple from straining so hard.

6. WEIGHT WATCHERS You shit so much, you lose several kilos.
SHIT.

7. RIGHT NOW SHIT. You had better be within 30 seconds of a toilet.
You burn rubber getting to the toilet. Usually
it has its head out before you can get your
pants down.

8. KING KONG or This one is so big that you know it won't go
CHOKER SHIT. down the toilet unless you break it into smaller
chunks. A wire coat hanger works well. This kind
of shit usually occurs at someone else's house.

9. CORK SHIT Even after the third flush it's still floating in
(also Floater) the bowl. You think "SHIT" how do I get rid of it.

10. WET CHEEKS SHIT. This shit hits the water sideways and makes a big
splash that gets you all wet.

11. WISH SHIT. You sit there all cramped up in the foetal position
and fart a few times, but no shit in sight.

12. CEMENT BLOCK SHIT. You wish you had a spinal anaesthetic before you
attempted this one.

13. SNAKE SHIT. This shit is fairly soft and about as thick as your
thumb, and at least a metre long.

14. BEER AND PIZZA This happens the day after the night before. Most
SHIT. of the time your shit doesn't smell so bad but this
one is BAD....usually this one happens at someone
else's house, and someone is always waiting outside
the toilet door.

15. MEXICAN FOOD SHIT. You know will know it's safe to eat again when your
(or Screamer) arse stops burning.

quote:

---

Originally posted by Roadog
Haha You stole this from Hustler mag...they used to have this competition every month..........Im not sure if they still do or not

---

__________________
Statistically... 9 out of 10 people actually enjoy gang rape.

I'm getting a bag of the good stuff at the weekend, so i'm guaranteed a dose of the shits after my first line

__________________
..:::RESERVED:::..

I want extra points for girth, shape and speed. It took less than 60 seconds to walk in the bathroom door, crap, take picture, wipe arse, wash hands, sniff fingers to check previous activities' success and then leave the bathroom.

:EDIT: ..I feel deeply ashamed for taking part in this but it's FOR THE FORUM!

Helpful hint number 2, don't read this thread while eating popcorn. Fuck knows what i was thinking.

n1 Vamp...

Overall I'm pretty disappointed with the lack of participation here...

__________________
Spitball Admin
http://www.spitballcinema.com

awaiting a post worthy shite

guinness and a ruby might do the trick

__________________
A Vote for Ave is a Vote for FREEDOM!

I dont usually eat a lot of corn but tonight I think I will make an exception. I am gonna go for a "mosaic" shit. peas, carrots and corn be damned.


:: Apparently I am out of corn. Lots of peas and carrots in my pot pie tho.

I want to see a female shit and compare it to a males....................just curious

av1 post one of yours so we can compare......


ps

dogs poop don't count, so don't bother with your weak retardation about dogs stuff..................k

__________________
When life hands you lemons, ask for tequila and salt and call me over.

There comes a point in your life when you realise;
who matters,
who never did,
who won't any more...
and who always will.
So, don't worry about people from your past,
there's a reason why they didn't make it to your future.

quote:

---

Originally posted by Vampire
I want extra points for girth, shape and speed. It took less than 60 seconds to walk in the bathroom door, crap, take picture, wipe arse, wash hands, sniff fingers to check previous activities' success and then leave the bathroom.

:EDIT: ..I feel deeply ashamed for taking part in this but it's FOR THE FORUM!

---

__________________
Statistically... 9 out of 10 people actually enjoy gang rape.

quote:

---

Originally posted by yoshy
I want to see a female shit and compare it to a males....................just curious

av1 post one of yours so we can compare......


ps

dogs poop don't count, so don't bother with your weak retardation about dogs stuff..................k

---

__________________
..:::RESERVED:::..

Vampire must have given up his crusade to improve the forums. Posting pictures of your own crap, has it really come to this.

quote:

---

Originally posted by cupidstunt
has it really come to this.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by monty23
If you are assuming the moral high ground, then the forums must be in a bad way

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by cupidstunt
Vampire must have given up his crusade to improve the forums. Posting pictures of your own crap, has it really come to this.

---

__________________
Statistically... 9 out of 10 people actually enjoy gang rape.

quote:

---

Originally posted by Neversoft
"Improving" the forums doesn't have to require cleaning them up... Just giving some structure and getting rid of some of our less amusing trolls would be a start....

Anyway, you spend most of your time on here posting shit, now you have our permission

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Neversoft
... getting rid of some of our less amusing trolls would be a start...

---

__________________
..:::RESERVED:::..

quote:

---

Originally posted by Avenue_1 v5.0b
Get rid of the unfunny troll. These forums had started to pick up, jizjock is bringing them down again.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by jicjak
By whose standards if I may be so bold to as enquire? The 20 or so good ole boys who control the forums and revel in each others “humor?” The 10 or so peripherals who join in from time to time depending on the topic? And that’s it out of what some 88,000 registered members? Who should be flocking in droves to comment on “while having a shit?”

In one word disgusting

---

__________________
Statistically... 9 out of 10 people actually enjoy gang rape.

quote:

---

Originally posted by Neversoft
I call him "Greg"

---

POW, that is just fucking sick.

Ding Ding, we have a winner.

__________________
Spitball Admin
http://www.spitballcinema.com

Family of Three

There's a lovely "mottled" effect on the right one... How did you do that?

Processed junk food (McDonalds) follwed by home-made nachos.

Softy...i hope your shit was in the company can....otherwise we know you had to clean the porceline when the water didnt fully flush away Gregg

not a good breakfast thread....think ill skip todays

__________________
zooted adj : 1. under influence of drugs: relaxed, excited, or euphoric from taking illegal drugs, especially marijuana ( slang ) 2. intoxicated: very intoxicated ( informal )
looter n. : someone who takes spoils or plunder (as in war) [syn: plunderer, pillager, spoiler, despoiler, raider, freebooter]

Steaky!!!

Fuck dude, have you been saving that one? Bravo!

I think we'll close this competition in a few days then find a nice, respecable person to choose a winner, or maybe add some voting buttons

I was carful not to clench til i got the majority of it out!! I did one similar the week before but this one was fuckin loooooooooong!!!

Steak, potatoes and brown bread!!!!