Neversoft
May 2002
 Admin?
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quote: Originally posted by spiketoo
Dear Mr. Soft:
First and foremost, I want to thank you for your sound and sage advice here. I've learned everything from just the right amount of lube to use in becoming a power wanker, how to fix a BMW clutch, how to reinstall XP and finally how to fend off Lobo's mum when she's in heat. I'm a better person for all of this.
My questions is this: is sucide painless? I do so wanna get it right. Nothing here in the Kolonies is worth living for it seems - our Prez is a fag, homeless are everywhere, Punjab recruiters are fucked and cant\wont find me a job, and my fav hockey team is gonna get rimmed in the first round like always. So other then the pleasure I derive here and from dl'ing porn, not much to live for.
I'm a wus and dont like pain, other then getting my balls squeezed just before I spurt. So what you recommend as the least painful way to die?
Thank you for your attention in this matter.
Well, theres always sleeping tablets, they're quick, painless but slightly wussy. Why not go out in style but still make it painless?
Ingredients:
1. Methodone, Heroin or some heavy-duty prescription painkillers and your preferred "delivery system"
2. A Cock Ring
3. Vast quantities of porn
4. A large plain/white wall or floorspace
5. Box-cutter knife
Method:
1. Position yourself in front of the wall, place the cock-ring on your flaccid knob.
2. Start the porn.
3. Prepare the drugs.
4. Begin power-wanking.
5. When you start to reach the "vinegar strokes", consume the drugs.
6. Once in a suitably dazed state and about to ejaculate, cut the end of your cock off with the box-cutter knife.
7. Spray a suicide note onto the wall with your cock... Note the years of sexual abuse at the hands of your parents as the main motivator.
8. Bleed to death with your tortured cock in your hand.
I hope everything goes well in your efforts!
__________________
Statistically... 9 out of 10 people actually enjoy gang rape.
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