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pHo
Oct 2001


pjeer?

Review: Charlies Angels Full Throttle (2003)

see how i got the name right? i rock. i could've typed charlies angels 2, but that was too easy!

anyway, been slating this a while now due to the fact i refused to watch the original on its "borrowing" of bullet time. looked incredibly cheesy and i had no want to see it.

but i got bored, so i watched the sequel.

hmm.

it has some excellent direction, altho that seemed to die out fairly early on. the opening stunt with the chopper is very nicely done, even if the actual idea of it is totally ludicrous, but its the bikes scene that blew me away. very much in the same way that blue crush's underwater photography saved it, this is the same here.

but alas, theres so many things wrong with this movie i dont know where to start.

ok, how about on an odd note.. the soundtrack. guys, its not the 90s anymore, do we REALLY need rage against the machine, lots of prodigy and even irene cara's What a Feeling (main theme from the 80s chick dance flick 'Flashdance') ? the answer is obviously "no". back in the late 90s this would've been a cliched action soundtrack, now its an outdated cliched action soundtrack, and quite possibly the worst OST i've ever had the misfortune to hear.

next.. cameos. whist i think cameos and famous actors popping up in minor roles can be refreshing and fun, do we REALLY need this amount? ok, for a start we have john cleese in the movie for several lines (and providing the only slight comic relief of the entire thing) matt leblanc basically playing joey, luke wilson (old school) as unneeded subplot boyfriend #1, robert patrick as random government guy #2, demi moore as ex-angel #4, etc etc. ie lots of famous people playing b-role parts for no reason at all. only person who's really needed is bernie mac, as politically correct only black person in entire movie #1of1.

then... subplots. there seems to be so many subplots getting in the way of the real plot , you forget what the movie is actually about. it seems the writers kinda forgot what the movie is about too, and i got bored of what was actually going on, and just wanted the next cool camera work to come into play. i didn't really give two damns about the girls boyfriends and stuff, this is supposed to be an action movie...

or is it? you see, the next major problem is it doesn't know WHAT it wants to be. you think it wants to be an action movie until you realise its so over the top, that theres no way you're supposed to take this seriously... so a comedy? nope, its simply not funny, and im not sure if its even trying to. chick flick? quite probably. y'see whilst diaz/barrymore/liu work fine in a "girl a gets dumped and girls b and c take her to a club to meet a new guy, who in turn dates girl a for a bet... " etc type movie.. as action heros? i dont think so. for the entire time of the film, you're thinkin to yourself "diaz would be crying in a heap on the floor right now" rather than seeing her fly across the screen kicking ass, screaming in a girly way for the 90th time in 5 minutes. so the only people this can be possibly aimed for are those girls who think there needs to be more girly action heroes. but of course michelle yeoh, linda hamilton, sigourney weaver and cynthia rothcock are too realistic hardened females, so they have to send the make up club in instead, and it just looks a lil bit too silly for me.

its a shame, as McG shows with the right script, he could've made a good action film. if you want action and comedy go watch True Lies, arnie certainly looks the part of a tough guy (even if he's not the smartest brick on the block) and theres decent enough humour rolled off the supporting cast, and with a sequel due soon, it might turn out to be everything Full Throttle wasn't. rather than making a movie that relies too much on 70s kitsch, stealing bullet time (which is still overused in EXACTLY the same way as matrix did it, sigh.. ) bad casting, no plots and awful soundtracks, lets hope he's given a script that will prove this guy really can make a good film.

5/10. so average and recycled it hurts, but with moments that prove it wasn't a total waste of your time.

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Old Post 07-08-2003 08:57 PM
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hooah_punk
Jun 2002

Really, its just hooah

Ok, where to start?...

The slowmo action seqeunces made feel I was watching Reloaded all over again (which is a turnoff) and then the whole I'm a women, hear me roar stuff got annoying 30 minutes in. About then, I turned it off, and went back to my computer. So, for the 30 minutes I saw (which was too much), I'd give it a 3/10. But then again, just an opinion. I heard www.boxofhate.com had free food stamps until 7/20/03. Check it out.

But all in all, the discs I used for this movie would've been better spent on a coke.

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Old Post 07-08-2003 09:08 PM
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commiewop
Apr 2002


Senior Member

yes i mostly concur with Mr pHo, didn't really care for this movie, glad i didn't burn it before watching

so i'll give it 4/10, which even might be being generous

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Old Post 07-08-2003 10:15 PM
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Mean Machine
Jan 2003


Unpaid Intern

Re: Review: Charlies Angels Full Throttle (2003)

quote:
Originally posted by pHo
ok, how about on an odd note.. the soundtrack. guys, its not the 90s anymore, do we REALLY need rage against the machine, lots of prodigy and even irene cara's What a Feeling (main theme from the 80s chick dance flick 'Flashdance') ? the answer is obviously "no". back in the late 90s this would've been a cliched action soundtrack, now its an outdated cliched action soundtrack, and quite possibly the worst OST i've ever had the misfortune to hear.


FINALLY! someone who shares my opinion on the soundtrack.... ITS A COMPLETE PILE OF SHIT!!! And the centropy sample just sums it all up for me... WTF?!? HAMMERTIME?!?! Sung by a guy with possibly the worst taste in clothes and dance moves I have ever seen in my life!! They may as well have just filmed an over 60s line dancing contest!!

Cameron Diaz is fit though.

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Old Post 07-08-2003 11:27 PM
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Bobby-Whiskey
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Good review, but I disagree

It wasn't as entertaining as the first one, but after seeing the first one, I knew what to expect out of the second: stupid fun. The only real laugh in Full Throttle is the running gag about Liu being a whore. The movie never tries to take itself seriously for a second, and that's why I liked it. Demi Moore also surprised me with her amazing looks and pretty good acting given the material she has to work with.

It is a bad movie, but its a slickly made bad movie.

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Old Post 07-08-2003 11:34 PM
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horizonstar
Dec 2002


$uXor

I agree with Bobby entirely. Having seen the first movie, I knew that the second one would be nothing but silly fun, and so did the writers and producers. This was one of the few movies I'd been planning on seeing in the theater this year, just cuz the silly stunts and the nice asses have to be seen on screen. So I went last night and thoroughly enjoyed myself. Not quite as good as the first one, but the addition of John Cleese was fun. And, pHo, some of the subplot stuff makes a lot more sense if you've seen the first movie.

So, IMO, the Judge Dredd factor comes into play here -- you know the film's going to be ultra stupid before you buy the ticket, so it totally rocks when you finally see it. -----> 8/10

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Old Post 07-09-2003 12:30 AM
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pHo
Oct 2001


pjeer?

lol, how are you disagreeing with me then, as thats pretty much exactly what i said

i said : we have john cleese in the movie for several lines (and providing the only slight comic relief of the entire thing)

you said : The only real laugh in Full Throttle is the running gag about Liu being a whore

(both referring to the same thing)

i said : it has some excellent direction ; its a shame, as McG shows with the right script, he could've made a good action film ; so average and recycled it hurts, but with moments that prove it wasn't a total waste of your time.

you said : It is a bad movie, but its a slickly made bad movie.

i didn't expect it to be any good, and i was right as a movie there's too much wrong with it, but it did have the sparkle due to the direction that a lot of action films are missing. i knew it wasn't going to be a serious action movie, but it had next to no comic relief either, so i wasn't sure what it was supposed to be , so i decided it must be a chickflick

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Old Post 07-09-2003 12:31 AM
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Bobby-Whiskey
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lol

I must have been a little tired when I read your review, because the overall impression that I got was that you gave it a big fat thumbs down, and that was the disagreement I spoke of.

Now that we're on the same page, I'll shut the hell up

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Old Post 07-09-2003 01:57 PM
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petrocs
May 2002


Your Moms Favorite

Just finished watching this...a little late cause I really didnt want to see it. Wasnt half bad..action was cool..dialog sucked..

5 out of 10

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Old Post 07-20-2003 11:23 PM
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